The Crepe Crusader

There can’t be many women forced out of a job because their boss was so offended by their ugliness. Imagine feeling hideously ugly, divorced, living in one room, and unemployed. I’ve lost hope, I’m living from day to day and I’m crying all the time.

Ollie's ex-secretary met up with me and we discussed the stress of clinging to such an awful job and the effects of eventually walking out. She confessed after she left she’d begun obsessively cleaning and had begun hoarding anti-bacterial wipes. I nodded.

I have my own confession. Two or three months ago I started obsessively buying pancake mixes. It doesn’t matter which brand (although Betty Crocker is my favourite). The funny thing is, as I’ve mentioned, my flat is quite small. When I ran out of room in my cupboards I arranged the batter mix on top of the units. My mum was concerned for my mental health and ordered me to stop buying them. I couldn’t. The stockpile grew. I worried about what would happen if I ran out. I told my mum the pancakes weren’t hurting anyone.

Even depressed, I can see the funny side. Wherever you sit in my flat you can’t escape the Betty Crocker boxes above the kitchen units.
I guess it’s no co-incidence that the strap line reads “Betty Crocker – Stir in the Smiles.”

I wish.

See you soon

Eva x