So then...

About Me

Welcome to my blog. My pen name is Eva James. I'm an aspiring writer paying the bills working as a legal secretary. Relentlessly bullied by my former boss, I looked for another job but the recession hit. Feeling trapped, I recorded everything in this blog, which serves as a revealing insight into workplace bullying. WEEK 1 starts the story and, as the weeks progress, you'll note what starts as banter soon spirals out of control. Sadly, it's all true. Whilst along the way I've found alternative employment, my passion for blogging about workplace bullying remains. Trevor Griffiths, legendary theatre, TV and film writer said at the outset, "I like the writing a lot: smart, cool, placed. If you were prepared/able to take your prick of a boss on, you'd marmelise him."

Wednesday, 23 June 2010

WEEK 76 Money Talks

They’re sending the money tomorrow.

It’s so quick my head’s spinning. My solicitor will hold it for me for a couple of weeks, but HOWARD and his pals are desperate to pay me off. They can’t get the money to me fast enough.

I can’t make sense of it. I never wanted money. I just wanted HOWARD to sort himself out and stop humiliating me. Why would they rather send over a wad of cash than apologise?

Truth is, I don’t know what to do with the settlement. What’s eating me up isn’t just the fact that I still wish I’d found a way to Tribunal, I’m also really scared. This is my big chance to change my life and I don’t know where to start. Do I really want to be a secondary school teacher? Maybe I’ve been insulted enough for one lifetime. What about writing? What about workplace bullying and raising awareness? What about the other creative things I want to do? What about using it towards a deposit for my own home and getting out of this rented shoe-box?

It’s a pressure I never saw coming. I have to make a decision about what I want to do with my life.

The money is nagging me to make a decision.

It won’t shut up.

But it wouldn’t be half so bad if it actually said sorry.

See you soon

Eva x

4 comments:

Fiona WordsBird said...

The very best advice comes from your own gut ... so, stash the cash in the bank and leave it there to fester.

Don't worry, it won't go off.

And while it ripens, like a good cheese, you can sleep on the decision many times. Eventually it'll become obvious what you are going to do next.

The big decisions are not usually the hardest - once you take the panic and stress out of your thinking.

Trust me ... and trust your own gut. You already know what to do. And sooner than you think, you'll find out.

Bullied By The Boss said...

Thanks Fiona,

You're right. I'm putting huge pressure on myself to make a quick decision.

If I stop panicking I'll hear myself think better.

I'm going to do exactly as you said. Put it in the bank until I know exactly what I want to do with it. x

Mr Fan said...

Great title, "Money Talks" a business trades for the bottom line, "Money" unfortunetly some peoples styles are to be down the line and just look at profits rather than treating people in a democratic way.

Way up all of your pros & cons and choose the one which tick most of the boxes. x

bigpip said...

I'd definitely use some of it to go on a holiday. It sounds like you really deserve to have a couple of weeks away from the grind. But do something unusual and challenging while you're away and it will inspire your decision as to what to do with the rest of it.

Bottom Swirl